Sunday, February 22, 2015


World of Warcraft 

My guild is called Is My Geek Showing, and they're a good group of people. My main character is a level 100 Night Elf Hunter named Daevana, with a level 90 Pandaren Shaman alt named Amatsukami. I started retail World of Warcraft in January of 2014, but as of late my interest in the game has waned, and I'm not entirely sure why. Part of me wonders if it had something to do with my social anxiety, or if it's a lack of interest in general.

I haven't been doing hardly anything on Daevana when I do log in, except collect work orders and rarely help out my husband with trapping or the apexis assault. Amatsukami was the character I level boosted when I purchased Warlords of Draenor, and I think I chose poorly. I have a Warrior alt I leveld to 5, and a Paladin alt I haven't played yet - I just can't seem to drum up any interest right now.

Any thoughts or suggestions on how I could regain my interest would be greatly appreciated.


At present I am participating in two games, with a potential up in the air for me to run. 

Vampire: The Masquerade


The ghouls game is set in the Classic World of Darkness, using the 20th Anniversary Edition rules. I've got a webpage for it here. But it's basically a game that my husband is running, wherein a friend of ours and myself are the players. It has been extremely fun, and I look forward to it every week.

Seattle By Night

Another ghouls game is set in the Classic World of Darkness, using the 20th Anniversary Edition rules. This is the up i n the air game, as I haven't been able to sit down with the interested partiesto do character creation. The webpage for it is here - pretty barebones at the moment, however.


Vampires is a game set in the Classic World of Darkness, using the 20th Anniversary Edition rules. This game is one being run by my husband, with myself and our two oldest children as players. As they are only 10 and 8, the game is toned down for them. We haven't had many sessions, due to the eldest getting distracted by tv when it's on, but they seem to have fun when we do play, which is what matters. 

New World of Darkness

Recently I've grown interested in the new World of Darkness (aka World of Darkness 2.0) a little, thanks to their Dark Eras kickstarter (which seems highly interesting, if nothing else). 

I did some research via the White Wolf Wiki and a post on the official Onyx Path forums helped out in giving me some decent summaries of each of the game lines. I'm interested in reading up on Vampire: The Requiem, Mage: The Awakening, Changeling: The Lost and Demon: The Descent. On the forums it was suggested that I start with the second edition stuff as it comes out, and right now VtR is the only second edition book out. 

I've resisted for so very long on learning anything about this line (the first books came out in 2004) because I was comparing it to the classic World of Darkness. This time around I tried to look at them on their own merit. It'll be a slow process, reading the books, just because of the way I've been with books in general lately. There's also no telling if anyone I know would be interested in playing after I am done reading (whenever that is), so I suppose you could say between the two I am feeling a little discouraged. 

Tuesday, February 10, 2015

Defining Myself

Crisis of Faith

Crisis of faith is a term commonly applied, especially in Western culture, to periods of intense doubt and internal conflict about one's preconceived beliefs or life decisions. ~ Wikipedia
I looked this up last night, and thought I would make it a part of my post. I don't think I am having a crisis per se, but I am having a lot of self-doubt in my chosen path, which is why I have decided to discuss my beliefs here, and hopefully get opinions/advice from my followers on this matter. Thanks to IFTTT this blog will copy to my Tumblr and Wordpress from my Blogger, as well as notify Facebook when I've posted, so I should hopefully get at least some commentary.


Faith is defined as confidence or trust in a being, object, living organism, deity, view, or in the doctrines or teachings of a religion. Faith is used to refer to a belief that is not based on proof or evidence. The word faith is sometimes used as a synonym for hope, for trust, or for belief. ~ Wikipedia
I do have faith in a higher power. But my beliefs in a higher power have changed over time. Growing up, my mom tried exposing me to some different things, but for a while my only concept was Judeo-Christian, I think largely in part due to my father's side of the family (they're Lutheran). My mother, if I recall correctly, was raised Methodist - but this is beside the point. She didn't have my sister or I baptized, because she wanted us to choose our own religious paths in life, and I have take this philosophy for my own children, and I thank her for taking it with me.

Higher Power

My current belief in a higher power is more or less as follows. I believe that there was once a higher power, consisting of no gender, who decided to split themself into many, so better to manage the world and the people in it. This is how we came to have many cultures' deities. They are all manifestations of the same creative force. Odin and Frigg are every bit as real as Zeus and Hera, and so on. 

Following A Specific Higher Power

I used to think that you had to follow a specific deity to be a part of Wicca - that I needed to put a face to what I was praying to. But now I don't feel that so much anymore. It's not a matter of not believing, but more a matter of not confining myself. That isn't to say I can't pay attention to whomever is trying to get my attention, or to ask for help from whomever I need, but more to say that I shouldn't focus on one and ignore others. Pray to the Divine, and whomsoever listens shall listen, and I shall be grateful for it. 

Heaven and Hell

I stopped believing in heaven and hell at least twenty years ago, if not longer. I could sear to you that I read  in a school textbook that they were concepts made up by medieval clergyman to scare the populace into going to church. And it made such perfect sense that things just clicked into place for me, as far as that was concerned. I never was able to find that text again, so I think it was just someone opening my eyes to the truth (side note: I was incredibly into Greek mythology at the time, so it may well have been a deity of that pantheon that opened my eyes). So where then, you may ask, do people go when they die? I'll cover that under my next subheading.


People die. It's an unfortunate, but necessary part of life. So where do you go when you die? The closest approximation I can come to what I believe, is the Summerlands. I's a place to go and to rest in between incarnations. Yes, I very much believe in reincarnation. I've had past lives, and have been informed that I am an old soul. When I was told this, it came as no surprise to me. I just don't remember many of my previous lives.


I personally think that I am very tolerant of other religions. Do I have a distaste for Christianity in general? Yes. Do I fault people for believing that way? No. I generally don't have a problem with someone else's faith and beliefs until they start trying to tell me that I am wrong, or they try to convert me. Then I have a problem.


I've considered myself Wiccan for the past few years. But so much self-doubt about if I can really do it has held me back, that I don't even read the books I have on the subject. I've tried reading one particular book several times over the past few  years, but I keep not retaining the information. That seems to be my problem with non-fiction in general - it doesn't hold my interest as well as fiction, so I don't retain the information as well, or can sit and read it for long.


I wrote about this a long time ago (well, two and a half years ago, on my Wordpress blog), and it still holds true. I'm going to copy what I wrote there over here, so as not to send people everywhere trying to understand what it is that I'm saying. Basically, I follow a blogger on Wordpress named Rowan Hale. She wrote the below post that I have copied in its entirely back in 2012 about the Wiccan Rede and it's shortcomings. I am in agreement with her. Here is the link to her post.

Daily Routine

I don't have a daily routine, and I really should. I keep meaning to, but there's that self-doubt thing that always creeps up. Or maybe it's just laziness - I'm honestly not sure. What do I feel I should do? Well, morning and evening prayers with my kids are probably a very good idea - I haven't been doing that. As it is, I don't always get the kids to do evening prayers. Daily meditation and grounding might be a good idea too, as well as taking better care of myself.

Ritual and Spells

Let's be clear - I have never done a ritual or performed a spell (that I am aware of anyway). I mean, sure I have a knack for kneading and pulling stress from my husband's aura, but does that count as a spell? I don't think it does, it's just something I try because it feels like the right thing to do.


I do not have an altar set up. I have neglected to set one up for a very long time, making the excuse that my youngest son will get into things and destroy it, or that I don't have the right tools or all of the tools for a proper altar. It is slowly coming to me that an altar doesn't need to be like this, but should be whatever you feel is appropriate for you. 

The "Right Way" To Do Things

There is no "right way" to do your spirituality. Come up with your own ideas, philosophies and beliefs, mesh them together and practice your own way. That is what I am coming to learn


In conclusion, I can't think of anything else to write about my beliefs right now. I think I have covered all the bases, and I've been distracted by music, so that doesn't help either, lol. Note to self: heavy metal not conducive to writing introspective posts!

Monday, February 09, 2015


Once again, I'm restarting my blog here. I hope all of you don't mind. i hope to try and post semi-regularly. Look for a new post this week. I intend to have this blog cover any gamut of topics, especially as I deleted my Day-To-Day and RPG Voices blogs. Please feel free to leave comments and suggestions.